Psalm 37:7 “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!
Have you ever had a season in which you just felt like you were left behind? That God had somehow stopped working in your life, everyone else was getting ahead, and you are just trying your best, and nothing is working? That you are different, set apart, and just floating alone with no direction?
About five years ago, I was picking potatoes in a field for a charity that provided fresh food to the poor. Directions were given on how to pick the potatoes. First, we needed to make sure none were cut with the blades, for they would rot and spoil the bags. Second, we had to dig deep enough to get the remaining potatoes in the ground.
I went with a group, and I was excited to serve. However, it was not long before I was left behind. The people picking the potatoes were loading their baskets with potatoes of all kinds, cut and uncut, and leaving what was just below the dirt. They seemed to provide an abundance of potatoes, but I was taking time and getting the harvest beneath the soil. I fell way behind and soon felt alone.
The picture in this post is of the actual potato-picking event. I was so lonely, left behind, like usual, doing my own thing. At that time of my life, I was also unsure of my next steps. I felt like I was always falling short in work or parenting. Now, I couldn’t even find joy in picking; I was always different. I stopped and took this picture because I was so aware of how left behind and alone I felt. I was crying out to God. I was never part of the group, getting little and the only one doing what was asked.
It is in this space that God reminded me that everyone may seem to be getting ahead of me, but they were not. Who was I serving? Was I doing what was asked? Helping? Or was I serving myself by trying to look like I was doing the “best” to everyone else? Those ahead of me, who went fast and threw in all the potatoes, missed a significant portion of food that could be given to those who were hungry. The cut potatoes rot in the bags with the good ones, causing the bags to stink and rotten potatoes to get everywhere. ( I also worked at a food pantry, and those rotten potato bags are the worst.) So what they produce looks great, but it serves them, not God, and what they produce is tainted.
So, If I am living by excellence, with honor, and doing what God wants, why am I often alone, left behind, and discouraged? Why can’t we all try our best? Why am I seemingly the only one who cares about doing what is asked?
Well my friend, living with integrity can be a lonely place. If you look at my image, a ton of people are standing at the top of the screen. I was left in the dirt patch with what looked and felt like a lonely place.
So what I want to ask you is, what do you do when you are in this lonely place? In a place that seems desolate and stripped, do you feel left behind and alone?
In Psalm 37:7 we read: Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!
Those who get ahead may seem ahead but don’t be tempted by this world. Take comfort in the fact that God has a plan for you. Can you be trusted to fulfill it, not to take shortcuts, and not to be tempted to lose your integrity? Will you give in and just do what looks good so you can feel good? Or will you turn to Jesus and ask him to give you patience and perseverance, understanding that waiting in trials is what gives us strength and character?
Romans 5:3-5 : We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.
If you are a practicing Christian, you will be asked to give up things, to do things differently, and to be trustworthy and steward what you do well. We are set apart in life in more ways than we can count. The problem is, it may be honorable, but it doesn’t always feel great.
Sometimes, a season looks dry, and nothing is coming up. I am actually in that space again now. After finishing my Master of Divinity from a prominent Seminary, I wonder why I haven’t found my place yet. If God called me, why does no one see or want me? Why am I wandering alone again? What I can tell you is that God sees all you are doing. I can also PROMISE you are not alone.
If you are a new Christian, God will show you things he may be asking you to let go of. There could be things you feel convicted about doing well or not doing to help you on your journey. For all Christians, new and established, the best practice you can do is read the word of God and know that all God’s people have health, survived, and prospered in these circumstances. Second, take time to build your Christian community. Prayer works. Pray for yourself and allow others to pray for you. All of us are struggling with different things in our lives. It is when we share what is going on and allow trustworthy others to speak into our lives and pray for us that we can grow in Christ.
God wants all you do, not just some things: your work, your time, your words. Trust the waiting, and know that God will provide all you need. I leave you with this scripture to remind you that there are seasons of our lives that feel like this, but they are not places of desolation but places of joy, for he is setting us up for greater things. Trust that.
Matt 6:30-32: And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won’t he more surely care for you, O men of little faith? “So don’t worry at all about having enough food and clothing. Why be like the heathen? For they take pride in all these things and are deeply concerned about them. But your heavenly Father already knows perfectly well that you need them.”
